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“Son I think he is about to die”

The words shook the very core of me as soon as I heard them. I ran down towards the garden and saw him lying there in the rain. Almost lifeless. I sat next to him. His eyes were still but as our eyes met, I maybe saw a flicker in his eyes.He was not dead yet.Staring into his eyes took me back a year ago.

The day I first met him…

“Hey there is a puppy in the block alongside and he is too weak”

“I don’t think he’ll survive.”

“You should take a look.”

So when the night came, after dinner, I went there to check on the puppy that my mom had apprised me about. And there in the corner I saw this weak puppy, about 2 months old, lying alone. His head was in the direction opposite to me. I approached him slowly.

I normally have this telepathic understanding with animals where they just accept me as their friend. So I was pretty much expecting that and was moving casually towards him, hoping this case would be the same. But when I was about 10-20 meters away from him, he just sensed my presence and before I could react, he started running away. Running away so intensely as if I was sent there by Satan himself to kill him, without even noticing the food I’d brought for him.

Things passed the same way for about 2-3 days and I knew he wasn’t going to survive much longer if this continues. Because apart from me, nobody was there to feed him and so he must have been very very hungry by then.

Sometimes I think the ignorance and the antipathy of the people of that block for animals was the reason for his extra cautious behavior but i guess its something I’ll never be able to fully comprehend.

So finally I just had to revise my strategy. From the 5th day, I started keeping the food at a point between him and me where he felt it was safe for him to approach the food. And slowly he started coming towards the food. His natural habit of exploration taking over his fear. And about a week later he had understood the fact that I was bringing him food and so at least he stopped running away at the very sight of me.

With time his health became better and I became a friend to him. But this did not change his tentative attitude towards others. Perhaps he had never forgotten his past. Me and my family members were the only ones he would trust. And we (my mother actually) named him PINTOO (yeah she has this habit of giving these cliched Indian nick names to dogs). The whole area was terrorized of Pintoo as he would bark angrily and chase anyone who acted even remotely suspicious. The people would always blame me and complain about me feeding such a stray and all, but I never reacted. Because I felt that the people deserved this after the way they had treated him. It was like poetic justice. After all, you are treated the way you treat others.

I was lost in these reminiscences when his loud breaths brought me back to reality. I must say that before that I had never actually seen somebody die in front of me. But those slow and even breaths of his, somehow made me sure that his end was near. Just before his final breaths, I placed my palm in front of his nose so that even if he couldn’t see me, he could smell me maybe and know that I was there with him… For Him.

And then something strange happened… for a second or two, he wagged his tail as if saying a final goodbye.

And about a minute later, the breathing stopped. And I just stood there for a while in the rain. I could feel a silent volcano of emotions erupting inside me. Then I went home and straight to my room, not knowing what to do. It was only when my mother asked me what had happened when the feeling of him dying actually dawned upon me and i started crying… Uncontrollably crying.


About Epizeuxis

Blogger , Guitarist , Altruist , Athlete, Sophist ... these all describe me... But what all these symbolize is my desire to be able do all the things which life has to offer and constantly grow as an individual...


14 thoughts on “Reminiscence

  1. I understand

    Posted by Carl D'Agostino | November 30, 2011, 1:51 am
  2. It’s amazing how easily they take over our hearts.

    Posted by pattisj | November 30, 2011, 2:43 am
  3. You were able to give him some happiness in his short life, so perhaps that last wag of his tail was him saying “Thank you my friend”.

    Posted by barb19 | November 30, 2011, 5:48 am
  4. In civil lines we met not one but three such newly born Pintoos. And our attachment became so strong that they used to stay inside our block all the time. But under the pressure of constant complaints from other residents, all three were thrown away towards the ground side. That very day, a mad dog came inside the colony somehow and killed all three of them. When I imagine the perdition they would have experienced, it becomes too hard to ignore the anger I have for the apathetic attitude of these “civilized” people.

    Posted by apoyando | November 30, 2011, 8:27 am
  5. It was his time to go, yet he did not pass alone, take comfort that you were there.

    Posted by Maxi Malone | November 30, 2011, 10:37 am
  6. You’re breaking my heart. But I’m grateful for the experience. We lost our cat, Felix recently. It hurts like nothing else.

    Posted by The Hook | November 30, 2011, 8:45 pm
  7. I know exactly how you feel, Epizeuxis. I’m so sorry…

    Posted by adeeyoyo | December 1, 2011, 11:15 am
  8. Epizeuxis, I never had a dog as a child but when I met my husband he bought a Jack Russell and I fell in love with her and two years later we bought another J.R and now here we are 10 years later and my little girl looks like a little old man and my boy is so energetic and happy that I dread the day when we have to put them down or when they pass. I have no children and my doggies are my babies that bring so much joy. I am sadden for you and my deepest sympathy for your loss. I pray God will bring you comfort.

    Posted by Tri | December 1, 2011, 7:04 pm
  9. Even though you told us what was happening at the beginning I still felt tears welling when I read the end of this.

    Posted by Bongo | December 2, 2011, 12:15 am
  10. Hey everyone, thank you all so much for being so supportive. I feel much better now.

    Carl… thanks for your opinion once again.

    Pattisj… yeah and that is because they are so pure in their feelings.

    Barb… I guess that was indeed a “thanks”… sometimes these unspoken thanks say a lot more than the ones said just in formality.

    Apoyando…The “Civilized” people you are talking about, all they care is about themselves and not others. They forget that the places belong to other animals as much as them. They just have the wrong notion of being above everyone else. I can understand your pain.

    Maxi… Thanks for the support.

    The Hook… I am so sorry to hear about Felix.May you get the courage to overcome the pain 😦

    Adeeyoyo… I am sure you do. This truly means a lot to me.

    Tri… I can understand your thoughts. But I guess all we can do is have a great time with them while they are with us. Live the present. They are so pure and lovely that you just hate to think about the times they won’t be around. But one can’t also waste the beautiful present, fearing the future. So just go and have a great present with them. 🙂

    Bongo… Hey, thanks for the comment. Yeah it is sad.

    Posted by Epizeuxis | December 2, 2011, 9:31 am
  11. This made me cry. I could feel your anguish. It’s so hard when a pet dies, but I know your presence meant something to him. I’m glad you were his friend when everyone else turned away.

    Posted by jannatwrites | December 4, 2011, 6:24 am
  12. the incidence was very much….I don’t think i have any words to console you…but I had a similar experience a couple of years ago with a squirrel baby…I was also disturb because of it…so I can understand, what it feels like to loose someone… 😦

    Posted by Cynosure | December 4, 2011, 1:30 pm
  13. this is so sad…i bet Pintoo was a great pal

    Posted by eva626 | December 5, 2011, 4:22 pm
  14. I’m sorry for your loss… I also lost a pet before, she died in quite a tragic way. She ran out of my Grandma house during a heavy rain and we find her a few hours after the rain stopped; drown in an open drain, unable to climb up because the drain was too deep :(.

    Posted by crawlingladybug | December 7, 2011, 1:19 pm

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About Epizeuxis

An Infrequent blogger, amateur guitarist , Altruist and a Sophist with a desire to be able do all the things which life has to offer and constantly grow as an individual.

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